The Decline of Morality Among the Tiv People of Benue State
By Ordue K. Ephraim –
It is difficult to find an agreed definition of the term ‘morality’ since it has been defined by different scholars according to their views and in conformity with their various areas of study. But for the sake of this essay, I will be considering the definition of morality according to the popular Merriam Webster dictionary as a bedrock for the understanding of my stand on morality and how it has declined in our contemporary Tiv society.
According to the Merriam Webster dictionary, morality is a behaviour that conforms to ideals of right human conducts. The term ‘morality’ can be used either descriptively to refer to certain codes of conduct put forward by a society or a group (such as a religion), or accepted by an individual for her own behaviour, or normatively to refer to a code of conduct that, given specified conditions, would be put forward by all rational people.( Stanford Encyclopaedia of Philosophy). Whether descriptively or normatively, the term ‘morality’ has to do with the principles of right and wrong behaviours, and in this discussion, emphasis will be placed on right behaviours that has declined in our contemporary society.
It is widely accepted that that morality varies according to cultures, customs, religions and traditions of the people. What is considered wrong by a particular ethnic group is considered right by another group and the revise is the case. Because I am not part of other ethnic groups and I know not much about them, I will be particular on the Tiv people of Benue State where I belong. It is easy and perfect to use the Tiv people as a case study because they are among if not the only group that speak and understand one another in Nigeria (MUTUAL INTELLIGIBILITY) despite some of the linguistic differences identified among the various regions that have formed the Tiv land; spellings and pronunciations. This is in consonance with the English language where despite its variations, there is mutual intelligibility. I am emphatic on language because language is a major tool that unites or separate the people. One who speaks a common language with another would surely understand each other, and as a result, the Tiv people understand themselves better.
According to my observations, the reason for the decline of morality among the Tiv people of Benue State can be largely viewed from the aspect of parental irresponsibility, even though there are other factors that have contributed to this menace. This includes the inability of parent to provide for the needs of their children, teach them the right thing at the right time, guide them in their relationship with other families and a good number of other reasons that will be discussed below.
The family is the first contact of an individual before he or she becomes a member of the wider society. As a result, family is the prime and most important source of obtaining values. Every child learns some values from his family since his childhood and retains those values in his mind throughout his life. The ways the parents nurture, educate and raise their child shape his personality and inculcate values in him. Growing up as a child, I was denied freedom from night movements. There was no way I could come back after 8:00pm and would not be punished if my parents were able to discover me. As an adult that I am, I find it so hard to move out and come back late in the night because I was taught to believe that it is not a good thing to do hence my parents who taught me did same.
Unfortunately, it has come to a point where parents believe that the society is spoiled and nothing can be done to redeem it from the wrongs it is facing without acknowledging the fact that 65% of the wrongdoings in the society is as result of parents’ negligence of their sole responsibilities. These parental irresponsibility can be discussed below:
Lack of control over domestic violence. One among the most discussed issue in families now is domestic violence. This menace has/is destroying a good number of homes. Children are abandoned by their parents. Some of this children are thrown on a pit where they are taken and nurtured by parents who are not theirs. Parents no longer control their disputes and at times involve in physical combat in the presence of their children. Yes, physical Combat has been a negative act long discovered among Tiv families most especially where the husband had married more than two wives. The home was jam-packed with conflicting ideas from all of these wives which generated much problem. At times, the husband would even ran out of his house in order to experience a temporal peace somewhere else. This ancient menace which has continued till date has contributed more than enough to the decline of morality among the Tiv ethnic group. Children experience quarrels, fights, gossip, robbery from their parents knowing fully well that whatever comes from their parents is the right thing to do.
Another striking contribution of parents towards the decline of morality among the Tiv people is their denial to teach what is right to their children at the right time. The black race in general has been intoxicated with western religious ideologies. We practise and remain loyal to religious doctrines and we sideline the natural realities around us. Parents now consider it an immoral act to discuss sexuality with their children. They feel it is an offence against the doctrines of the faith they practise not even God. They allow their children grow and attain ages that they can marry knowing little or nothing about their sexual lives. Yes, ignorance is the reason some parents fail, but what about the good number of parents that know but refuse to teach?
This has contributed to the good number of abortions our society now experience. Unborn children are murdered on daily basis because these children do not know when to involve in sexual intercourse. Many parents today encourage their female children to take contraceptives giving them a broad chance to participate in sexual intercourse as they wish. These children are not sensitised on the importance of sexuality and the dignity attached to it right from creation. The pride of a good number of our contemporary parents is that their child should know how to have sex, not that their children should be respected as virgins in their matrimonial homes. Sex education is a primary role of the family and should not be neglected by parents. Children should be taught on how to avoid those who abuse their bodies and how to manage heart breaks if encountered.
Again, the kind of movies our children watch is taking over the domestic roles of parents over their children. Because the modern society has supplied us with televisions and other network sites like the DStv, GOtv etc. parents now spent much of their leisure times on movies most of which are morally impacting on sexuality and domestic violence as well as war movies. Unfortunately, our world has grown reach a stage where children of two or three years understand and hold unto what they see, hear or feel. These children as little as they are grow up believing that sex, domestic violence and use of weapons are part of life and must be lived without understanding the ordained mission of the human race which is to maintain peace and unity. Some of these little children are seen must of the times at the backyards of their parents houses practising how to have sex, how to beat their wives and how to shoot using toy guns among themselves because these movies have taught them how to do it. It is wrong for parents to kiss each other in the presence of these kind of children not to talk of having sex in their presence since their innocent brains are waiting patiently to pick whatever comes from their parents.
Lastly, parents no longer allow strangers to help train their children even though it has become difficult to trust strangers amidst an evil world like we have. To an extend, parents attack teachers in schools on various occasions warning them not to punish their children. Some even provide fake medical certificates forbidding teachers from punishing their children. No matter what, a child that is trained in another home that is well scrutinised to be standard in dispensing morality would be better as compared to those receiving no credible training in their biological homes. These kind of children with immoral training have no respect for elders and unfortunately, their parents too.
In the presence of social media sites; Facebook, Whatapp, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube etc. I still believe that if parents in the Tiv land stay tuned on impacting the ancient moral values to their children as at when due, the Tiv people will continue to have a good number of wonderful youths that can reflect the moral standards of the rich tradition, customs, religion of their people.
Dear parents and guardians, morality in the Tiv land is in your hands. You can let it die off or re-enact it. Play your part and live the rest to God. Tell your children all that they need to know about their lives. Do not be harsh on them and show them love. Provide for their needs and do not abandon them at the time of their failures because these are moment you will have to endure with them.
Conclusively, let us work hard and restored our values that were built with the aid of the rich folktales, riddles and the rest of the Tiv oral literature that were there before movies. If our children must watch movies, they should be guided on the kind of movies they watch considering their age limit. Do this and together we will build a moral society that would be envied by our neighbours.
